The topic is sort of the same, but I don't have time to write about 5 blogs over this topic-
There is a trend of Tik-Tok, Facebook, Whatever social media in which one in a couple, married or just long-term dating, questions " What would it be like if we met in high school?" Generally this is the girl asking the question. And in many cases the girl turns out much younger than the guy, when he was in high school, she may have been in junior high or even younger.
I know when I was a senior in HS, my wife was in 9th grade. I am not sure she had even gone through, or was going through puberty. I would not have even known she existed, never mind, we were both in HS band. She held no interest, she was a child in my eyes. And a freshman. There is no lower form of life than a HS freshman. I hate, still do, hate freshmen.
It was bad enough she was barely 18 years old when I started dating her in university. I was a " cool and suave" senior. In truth, I saved her from the sharks who were circling. ( I say that, she does not, did not realize the number of upperclassmen who wanted to take her out for nefarious reasons. And I say this in all seriousness.) And as I have said for years, she literally made the first move. She asked me out. Big time date for chili-cheese tater tots from Sonic and Dr. Pepper, after a Lamar game, we played West Texas State, and she paid.
My parents were upset when they found out she was a freshman, my father even had a talk with me about 'dating a little girl.' That was until they met her and found out she was about 35 years old in her maturity. The boy she was dating was still about 13. She literally "wowed" them.
As many of you know, when I met my wife I had not dated anyone, had a date, asked anyone out for about 2 1/2 years. So, things were bad then too. ( Plus I had gone through a situation that would have been the subject of a Stephen King book. So wild, if I had not lived it, I would not have believed it.)
( And it wasn't that I did not have opportunities to date girls, there was a girl, who was 'wife material' who did everything she could to date me. Trouble was, she was somewhat naive, and there a boy she met in in college who was using her as a 'play toy.' Not really dating, she was just someone to take to the motel. She asked me more than once to go with her to the motel, even expressed the fact she would stop seeing the other boy to 'be with me.' She knew if I am going out with you, it is as a romantic partner. One even she ran into me up town and told me she would tell the other boy " no more" and she would go to a motel with me......Yes, wife materiel, not mine. I even had a couple of female friends tell me I need to "save her" from the other guy.....No, not my girlfriend, not my wife, just wasn't.
All that said, we Boomers do not understand the situation young adults are in today.
( And it is not seen in this area, yet, as the cost of living here is so different and cheaper than the rest of America. And in truth, unless you've been here forever, why does anyone want to move here? The heat and humidity? The nightlife? The jobs, and in many cases, construction which is a major employer here, isn't always stable work. Heck, we can't get people who live here to stay here and work, look at the RV around major construction sites, and they're not always hiring our people.)( Our best and brightest don't stay here. They leave.
-Gen Z, Millennials, heck Gen X in many cases can't afford houses.
-Many are in super debt due to college, and don't say, well, they need to get jobs in the trades. Trouble is, the so called dirty jobs are being dominated by people not originally from America, and their pay is nothing.
-45% of people 18-30 live at home. They can't afford to move out.
- 50% of people under age 40 are receiving economic help from their parents.
- There is the ' kardashian effect' for some many young women now. Social media is telling them they are all '10s' and they deserve a '10' to date and marry.
Most people, are at best '5s' men and women.
There is idea from many that people should spend $400-700-1000 on a first date. That to just date you, guys should pay their bills...I saw a girl interviewed, and she was cute, but she said her first date should be on a yacht, with a 1000 roses, each with a $100 bill attached, a Birkin bag as a gift with a $25,000 Visa gift card inside. And of course, this should take place off the coast of France in the Med.
I am surprised at the number of girls who think at age 25 their boyfriend should be making $250,000.
And most boys age 18-30 have not had sex, or been on a date in over a year. Now I know a lot of guys have just 'given up.'
But boys, you dress like feckin' slobs. I was out and about yesterday and every young man had filthy jeans, horrible stretched out T-shirts, unkempt hair, hair looked like it had not been washed in months. I know it's hard to ask out girls, but not all have the 'kardashian effect' influencing their lives.
( Now I know I had on a Brooks Brothers shirt, a Belfast check Ralph Lauren sports jacket,Duck's Head khakis, Sperry topsiders and an Ivory linen flat cap. But I was in Mid-County and I am afraid I might run into Bryant Long and I don't want him to be ashamed of me......I would dress like that normally. I am telling you, as Beau Brummel said, " Clothes make the man.")
-And I am going to get in trouble here.
Girls today don't understand why boys don't want to marry or even make them their long term partner if they've been with 60-80-120 people. Especially being with boys. Guys understand if you have boyfriends or husbands in the past and you've been with them, but many, many guys/people? I know I would be concerned, what if she decided number 79 was the best guy I have ever been with, and no matter what you do, you will never live up to him. Or what STD might you have in which there is no cure?
Call it old fashion, call it whatever. I could not do it.
If I had been with another person, my wife would not have stayed with me. She was adamant about it. And it was one of the first things she let me now, and asked about. She didn't want to become emotionally attached only to find out otherwise. Now we were young, but she was serious about it.
And believe it or not, there are Gen Z guys who feel this way. ( Not all, but many) And we're not necessarily talking about her being a virgin, but not with 95 guys.
And something else I do not understand, maybe it's a Boomer moment on my part, but I do not understand girls who have slept with 60-70 guys and they decided they are now " Born-Again" Virgins. And when they find a guy they think, or want to be their husband, they won't sleep with them until they marry.
And some of these girls are not telling the guys until their wedding night. They're claiming they are virgins. And somehow in their minds, they are telling themselves that they are.
Then, we have access to people online around the world, and there are so many guys who treat you 18-22 year old daughter as a mark. Convince her she is the one, maybe even fly her out to Vegas/Miami and use and abuse her. Her not understand why there is not another guy like that for her. Psychologically making her think some guy like that is going to be her husband, when in reality, the guy just want a strange " piece of a$$."
- But Boomers, the young folks today are not having it easy. Yeah, we think we had it hard when we were Gen Z's age, but it is nothing like the kids are going through today.
Young folks can't afford houses.
They can't afford automobiles.
Heck insurance is out the roof.
Food is out the roof.
The jobs today don't pay enough to keep up with today's cost of living.
40% of all jobs, even from major corporations are ghost jobs, don't really exists, they are pools that companies are building for various positions. They are even doing interviews for jobs that are not open. Schools have done this for years.
The federal and state governments are saying the employment outlook is good. Yeah, it is good for low paying, often part-time positions. Jobs you really can't make a family from.
I know, long and arduous, I am going to climb into my bunker now.
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